Wednesday, June 20, 2007

My Wilderness

The other day I was talking to a dear friend and I shared with her my recent spiritual frustrations. I simply said, "I am in the desert, and it's not even a good one!" You know, in the Bible a wilderness experience normally preceeds a visit from the Lord. In my life it has always been the same, God meets me in the desert. The desert times, the dry times are when God can grasp our attention, because we are seeking something. Not so this time! I have felt very alone in this wilderness! But God has finally allowed me to see a glimpse of His presence and to once again hear His voice. Oh how desparate I have been for that! Just a few weeks ago, I started the Bible study, He Speaks to Me by Priscilla Shirer. It has been amazing. God has been teaching me so much. This week we have been studying about "a single minded worship." This seemed to be a theme in my house this week as well. How often is Sunday morning the craziest time of the week! Satan so tries to distract us with everything he can, and by the time we arrive at church we are exhausted, stressed, and in no way ready to meet our Savior! God has been teaching me to truly plan for worship, such simple things as preparing ourselves for corporate worship on Sunday morning, and trully PLANNING to worship him every day. So often pride and other sins get in our way and we find ourselves distracted in worship. A big distractor for me in worship and ministry has been my desitre to people please. Seeing as though being a mom is my primary ministry these days, God has really allowed me to get perspective in this area. Having a 2 year old, my best efforts of affirmation, correction, discipline and training, are often lost when we are out in public! I want so badly to be a "good" parent, and while I know any 2 year old is far from perfect, God truly is teaching me humility through Eliana! In addition, 2 year olds are wonderful equalizers! My knowledge or ackomplishments are truly lost on her; my 2 year old does not care that I have a masters degree! Talk about truly learning to please an audience of One! All that I once sought diligently . . . as Paul said, "I count as loss." Toddlers surely put people pleasing into perspective! God is Good! Cast aside all distractions, Plan to Worship Him, Plan to please Him, Plan to be "single-minded" in worship!

4 comments:

The Cooke Family said...

My sweet cole! I am so excited that God is speaking to you right where you are at. We are so much alike it's not funny. I don't have a master's degree (or any for that matter), but somehow being a parent brings on it's own sense of pride, degree or no degree. If we fail with our children, what can we feel we accomplished? God will use your children (I am convinced) to teach you more things than any other circumstance. No amount of knowledge can ever prepare us for what God wants us to learn personally. Know why? Because no one has lived your life. You will see special things that God has just for you, and no one will understand, nor can you teach it to anyone. I love hearing how God is working in your life. You already are a reflection of him! I love you much!!!

Susan Hunt said...

Hey Nicole! Glad I found you on here!! I have a blogger account too...hope you don't mind if I add you as a link on my site!

Vicki said...

It is so good to be hearing from you again! I can AMEN what your sister has said! I LOVE being able to keep in touch like this, it just makes it easier for me! I want to know how you get all that stuff on the side of your blog. I am not a pro yet! Help me out, girlfriend! Mostly I want to know how to put other's blogs on the side. Love ya!

The Cooke Family said...

I need to see another post soon - AND a picture of Caden is a MUST!!!!